Bad Apple?

The CE has long called them “Kool-Aid drinkers”. He is referring to the Apple acolytes who, in his estimation, have foolishly traded off their common sense to pay exorbitant sums of money for slickly designed Mac this or that through the years.

Remember when they used to look like this? (image from metromacsupport.com)

Remember when they used to look like this? (image from metromacsupport.com)

I take the more middling view. I never particularly worshipped at the altar of Steve Jobs (frankly, he seemed to me to be kind of a jerk) but clicking and dragging always seemed to make more sense than churning through cumbersome PC commands. And there is no denying the sheer sexiness of Apple products. It’s like hating on Angelina or Gwyneth – plenty not to like but hard to take your eyes off the packaging.

Looks count for something. (image from digitaltrends.com)

Looks count for something. (image from digitaltrends.com)

But ultimately, for me, a brand is a brand is a brand, unless you are talking about Golden Retrievers, where I will never, ever deviate from 100% loyalty.

Brand loyalty forever!

Brand loyalty forever!

For instance, I deliriously loved my Blackberry, but I was not too besotted to see the handwriting on the wall when they faltered.

It was great while it lasted, Blackberry (image from www.ebay.com)

It was great while it lasted, Blackberry (image from http://www.ebay.com)

And so, I moved on. I got an iPhone. For a while, I had to endure the sneers of my beloved CE, who tried to defend the byzantine brick of a Droid he insisted on carrying around. Tried and failed – he has an iPhone, now, too. Ha ha ha!

But. Just when I would love to get all smug and declare Apple the winner of everything, they have let me down big time. Twice.

If you, like me, have a first generation iPad, I hope you are coming up with creative uses for it (coaster? trivet?) because Apple has abandoned it and you. No iOS support. It runs iOS 5 which is already two generations behind. Email still works but don’t try to accomplish much on a web site.

First generation iPad: would it work as a frisbee? (image from ebay.com)

First generation iPad: would it work as a frisbee? (image from ebay.com)

Proof that all that glitters is not gold, those of us who were seduced by that first iPad’s curves have been dropped cold by Apple. Faster than the apps crash on the screen. They didn’t even bother to break up with me by text – no apologies, no regrets. Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

And last week, adding insult to injury, Apple’s latest iOS 7.3 update poisoned my phone camera. Here’s what I saw when I tried to take a photo:

Is Apple out of focus? The camera no longer works on my iPhone 4.

Is Apple out of focus? The camera no longer works on my iPhone 4.

After trying and failing to take a photo with my phone, I found a ten-page discussion on Apple Support Communities, I finally figured out that it wasn’t my eyes that weren’t working, it was my phone camera.

I rushed into the Verizon store yesterday to see what was up with that, and was blithely told by a clerk that “oh, yeah, it’s a glitch in the software update. Mostly affecting older phones.” Meaning the iPhone 4, which I’ve had for, oh, I dunno, maybe a little over a year? The implication here is that if you didn’t march right in and buy an iPhone 5 when they came out, you will be left behind. Survival of the newest.

The fellow at Verizon could see that I was taking this hard. Being broken up with by Apple twice is tough on the psyche. “Don’t worry”, he said, “they’re going to release a patch.”

“When?” I queried, thinking of all the important photos of chickens that cannot be taken while my camera phone has been taken down.

He shrugged his shoulders. It’s Apple. When they darn well get around to it, you peon.

Seriously, I thought this attitude only worked for the government.

(image from secretsofthefed.com)

(image from secretsofthefed.com)

I hated on Apple for an entire thirty-six hours over this. And then, this morning, voila! my phone camera miraculously came back into focus! They have redeemed themselves. Chicken pictures can re-commence.

Pippa enjoying a morning sunbath

Pippa enjoying a morning sunbath

So Apple and I are back together. Today, at least. But I have to admit, I’ve lost some trust.

For the moment, however. my software is up to date and all’s well with the world. Pass the Kool-Aid, please.

(image from digital trends.com)

(image from digital trends.com)

About polloplayer

Empty nester searching for meaning of life through the occasional chicken epiphany.
This entry was posted in Annoyances of Life and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to Bad Apple?

  1. Katherine says:

    I couldn’t agree more. Which is why you’ll often hear me muttering: “An apple a day.” The end. Doesn’t keep anything away. Just means you pretty much have to buy an apple product a day once you go down that road.

  2. dizzyguy says:

    Do you prefer the cherry or lemon-lime?

  3. tdevir says:

    Yes I drink the Koolaid and I too have been told by AppleCare that they can not help me with my “vintage” product. Sighhhh. The alternative is tempting (waterproof!) but I fear we as a family are too dependent on our iCloud account. We love that our photos, contacts, calendars and iTunes purchases all sync on every device almost instantly. I guess we are too far gone… Pass the cherry flavor.

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