Archive for January, 2012
Nice nest!
We received a very special invitation from our favorite elves, Julia and Grant. Yes, those elves, the ones who spend their Thanksgiving weekend each year putting up all our Christmas decorations for us while we’re in NYC so that we get to come home to a perfectly decorated house. Very special friends, indeed!
While they were decking our halls for us over this past Thanksgiving holiday, they were also watching the local real estate market and came across a great house at a great price. Faster than you can say quick escrow, they were moved in. In just over a month, their house has become a lovely home, and last night they had us over for dinner.
We loved getting to see their cozy new nest!
What Happened in Vegas.
The Council of Olders convened for a Third-Time’s-a-Charm tour in Vegas last week. It was a wild group: the median age hovered right around seventy. And yes, some nights we even stayed up past 9 pm!
When Uncle Delbert fell ill in November and spent several cranky weeks convalescing in a nursing facility, the CE vowed that once Del was sprung, we were all heading to Las Vegas. Del’s favorite caregiver, Juanita, was enlisted, family members cleared their calendars and, voila! we weren’t in Kansas (or California, Montana, Minnesota or Florida) anymore!
Per usual, we stayed at the Bellagio, which was all decked out with Chinese New Year decor.
Del, Juanita, PG, Gail and Mark have all made the trip with us before. But this year’s group included two Vegas Virgins: Mark’s wife, Jean, and Gail’s SO, Paul. Here’s the gang after a much-enjoyed dinner at Mon Ami Gabi:
There’s always something for everyone in Vegas. Mark and Jean loved the Bellagio gym; the ladies gathered for manicures at the luxuriant Bellagio salon; Paul and Gail toured the various casinos; the CE played poker, and Del won at the slots. An intrepid contingent of the group headed out one day for a tour of Hoover Dam:
Vegas shows are always a trip highlight for this group. This year we were wowed by Cirque du Soleil’s LOVE.
And then we were dazzled by Celine Dion’s “A New Day” production. The CE and I had seen Celine’s previous Vegas show, which was terrific, but the new one is truly spectacular. Her coterie of supporting musicians are outstanding and Celine has an unmatched ability to connect with her audience.
Everyone seemed to agree that it was the best trip yet. Rest up, Del – there could be a four-peat in our future!
There was one empty seat at the table this trip. I ordered a few Manhattans to toast the memory of my father, who dearly loved these Vegas jaunts. I’m guessing the show in Heaven is even better than Celine.
Happy Birthday, T!
Taylor turns 25 today. At 6:46 pm, to be precise. I’ve always figured it was because he wanted to be here in time for dinner as he is a boy who loves a good meal.
The world is SUCH a better place with him in it.
A few pix from his first birthday:

Presents! Yes, his guest for his first birthday was none other than Alexandra! Talk about going way back!
Tay Tay, I hope you have the happiest of birthdays. And I also hope that your friends tease you mercilessly over these pix
Blank#$*%ing Technical Difficulties
Two hours of “error in retrieving your photos” and outright computer crashes. We are traveling, and my Macbook Air seems determined to head off into the sunset with Steve Jobs.
By the way, did you know that steadfast non-believer Jobs’ last words were “Oh wow. Oh wow. Oh wow.” And personally, I don’t think he was talking about a new Apple product.
But I digress. Apologies for no Polloplayer update today. I promise a few Vegas photos when we return home and I’m back at the wheel of my Costco HP desktop.
Score for today: PC – 1; Mac – 0
“Gampa, you’re so silly!”
Just when the house became a little too quiet, we got a call that the Newportians were coming for a quick visit.
Evie and Viv tumbled out of the car and ran straight to say hello to Hope.
Then the CE, aka Grandpa, bustled them off for a swim before dinner. And after dinner, of course, we read stories in front of the fire.
Grandpa listened, too.
Viv said, “Gampa, you’re so silly!”
Evie said, “Grandpa and Nana, you live on a farm!”
(Does that mean the CE is silly enough to let me get that pair of pygmy goats I’ve been hoping for?)
Sometimes Viv is in a shy mood when she sees us, but this visit she had a lot to say to Grandpa.
We took a long walk on Sunday morning.
Thanks for the visit!
Nest. Empty.
Ours, luckily, has always been one of the houses where the boys’ friends came to hang out, and it was nice to have a reprise of that while Daniel was home for this holiday. Once the chaos of Christmas was past, the kids settled into relaxation mode before heading back to school.
It was comforting to see them gathered in the kitchen and family room, and to hear their voices waft up from the jacuzzi late at night. As any mom knows, the happiest times are when your kids are right there under the same roof with you.
But now Daniel has gone back to NYC for his last semester at Columbia, with one job offer in his pocket and the certainty that he is staying in the city after he graduates. Taylor was only here for a very few days this holiday – vacation time is precious and we’re just grateful to have had him here at all. The post-holiday light bulb has clicked on: we can’t take these times for granted.
When you live in a place where the demographics favor “the newlywed and nearly dead”, you can’t expect your kids to move back home. We’ve encouraged them to think of their lives as their own and to find their own path, and, good for them, that’s what they’re doing.

If things don't work out in the city, Daniel, you can always come home and be the Shoo-Bear's valet.

Wake-up call: Victoria came all the way up from LA to drive Chris and Daniel to the airport early in the am.
And I think I’ve been a pretty good sport about this empty nest thing. I just reserve the right to have a relapse now and then. Today, I miss my boys.
Wherever they go and whatever they do, I just hope all roads always lead home at Christmas.
Dear Everyone: Is the Thank-You Note Obsolete?
Back in the days of buggy whips and land lines, I made sure the kids wrote thank-you notes for their Christmas gifts. I would set a table with pens, paper and lots of favorite snacks as enticement, and felt reasonably sure that, whatever glaring faults they might develop, my children would grow up remembering to acknowledge with a written flourish every gift, kindness and wink that came their way. Full disclosure: I’m one of those people who can even justify sending a thank-you note for a thank-you gift, which may be why my now-grown children run the opposite way from watermarked stationery.
Then along came the Internet and, while forests of trees undoubtedly breathe easier, the written thank-you note seems to be heaving its last gasps. In 2003, the etiquette doyennes’ answer to the question “when is it appropriate to send a thank-you by email” was “Almost never”. Today, even that bastion of propriety Emily Post has been beaten into submission and now gives a non-committal “it’s never wrong to send a written thank-you note”
Decidedly, no, it is not. More to the point, is it ever right to send an email thank you? There is wide professional agreement online that following an interview, a prompt email thank-you is appropriate, given that the business world could presumably crash and burn in the three days it might take for gratitude to arrive by snail mail. The sniveling Ms. Post even allows that when it comes to gifts, “if it is from a close friend or relative (and it’s not a wedding gift) you can email or call instead if you prefer”.
Well, duh, who is NOT going to prefer? Other than me, of course. I remain entranced by the allure of Mrs. John L. Strong, William Arthur and Cranes, all makers of stationery so thick and creamy it almost seems edible. And if I wasn’t a leftie who drags ink allong the page as I write, I would probably also be up to my ears in Watermans and Mont Blancs.
Here’s a radical thought: why stop at thank-you notes? When was the last time you sat down and wrote someone a letter? On the one hand, you have these impassioned words from Napoleon written to Josephine: “My waking thoughts are all of you. Your portrait and the remembrance of last night’s pleasure have robbed my senses of rest. Sweet and incomparable Josephine, what an extraordinary influence you have over my heart….” Today’s equivalent would probably be a text to the effect of “Last night was kool. U wanna hook up again?” How silly are you going to look someday when you’ve conquered the western hemisphere and that’s the written legacy that goes in your bio? Think about it. On the other hand, don’t think about it – just go write someone a nice letter.
Admit it – you get a little thrill when you check your mail and there’s something besides bills and the weekly Coupon Clipper, right? Okay, so maybe you equate the hand-addressed envelope with a $20 stuck inside from Mom. That’s okay, too. I’m old-school, though, and anything hand-written, short of “Thought I’d drop you a note to let you know your taxes are being audited” is a bright spot in my day.
Oh, and an added incentive: As of January 22, 2012, the price of a first-class US postal stamp goes from 44 to 45 cents, so you’ll want to get your notes mailed before that date or else buy all those annoying sheets of 1 cent stamps.
Now, all that said, does it mean my holiday thank-yous are all written and sent? Well, no, not exactly. But I’m working on it. And if nothing shows up in your mailbox by the end of this week, you might want to check your email…
The 117th day of Christmas
It’s Groundhog Day in red and green. Our tree is still up. The poinsettias are still on the front step. And I am embarrassed to say that the CE’s and my stockings are still hung by the chimney with care – we’ve been too busy taking down wreaths and sweeping up pine needles to open them. We cannot seem to vanquish the jingle-belled monster that Christmas has become. And now, neither can you, because here you are, forced to view the rest of our holiday pix:
Happily Back in Hell: a literary mash-up of Dante, St. John of the Cross and Robert Frost
This may be a yawner for faithful readers, but every day I get at least a few hits on Polloplayer from souls in search of Divine Comedy details. More than likely these are desperate high school or college students up against a deadline who haven’t read the book, it’s too late to even get the SparkNotes and they are hoping for divine intervention in the form of a perfectly written and untraceable term paper. Instead they get chickens!
True to my New Year’s resolution, I cracked open the Inferno to begin a second reading on Sunday. Last time around, I read the Sayres translation; this time I started with Mandelbaum. I decided to compare it with the other versions the CE has given me, including a gorgeous limited edition copy of the Norton translation with designs by Boticelli. An embarrassment of riches!

Illustration from the 1955 Norton limited edition: Dante encounters the leopard, the lion and the she-wolf in Canto I (Polloplayer image)
Reading four translations at once is only a slight deja vu – each one has its own nuances and read simultaneously, they lend depth and breadth to the understanding of the work. Because this, my friends, is no comic book. The Divine Comedy will be found on any serious list of the best literature ever written, and for good reason. As I read the opening lines of Canto I for the second (and third, fourth, fifth time) I was struck with a completely new perception of the work. Here are the lines:
Bergin translation (1969):
“Midway along the journey of our life
I found myself within a gloomy wood
For the right pathway had been lost to view”
Hollander translation (2000):
“Midway in the journey of our life
I cam to myself in a dark wood
for the straight way was lost”
Mandelbaum translation (1980):
“When I had journeyed half of
our life’s way, I found myself within
a shadowed forest, for I had lost the path that
does not stray”
Norton translation (1955):
“Midway upon the journey of our life I
found myself in a dark wood, where the right
way was lost”
As I read the subtly different shadings of these translations, especially the Hollander, which succinctly states “the straight way was lost”, it occurred to me that what Dante was describing might correctly be linked with the concept of The Dark Night of the Soul as described (a few hundred years after Dante’s time) by St. John of the Cross.

Written in the 1500′s this work is still sought out by seekers of Christian spirituality (Barnes and Noble image)
St. John of the Cross was a 16th century Spanish Carmelite monk whose master work continues to be widely read today. The simplest definition of the “dark night of the soul” is when one has lost his or her way and no comfort can be found, even in faith. Some claim that Christ endured such a time at Gethsemane. Most of us expeience periods of darkness and hopelessness in our lives, and if they occur with a crisis of or an absence of, faith, they can be crushing. Dante had been banished from Florence and was a wandering political exile, separated from the people and places he loved during the thirteen years he spent creating the Divine Comedy. It’s not a stretch to imagine that he experienced a “dark night of the soul” during this time.

Dante was banished from Florence during his lifetime, but a prominent statue of him stands there today. (image from molon.de)
At least one observer has made a connection between Dante’s presumed dark night of the soul in The Inferno and the decidedly more accessible Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening by Robert Frost.
I don’t know who Tina Blue is, but she appears to know a thing or two about poetry. In her Internet article How Literary Allusion is Used in a Well-Known Poem by Robert Frost which can be found here she interprets Dante’s opening lines of the Inferno as being consistent with the “dark night of the soul” experience and also cannily observes that Frost pays homage to Dante’s terza rima meter with a similar rhyme scheme. Not everyone can or will undertake to read the Divine Comedy, but you can enjoy Frost’s poem right here:
Ms. Blue asserts that Frost had Dante and the “dark night of the soul” on his mind in the lines “He will not see me stopping here / To watch his woods fill up with snow” According to Blue, Frost “means us to understand not only the woods’ human owner, but also at some level God, whose “house” (the church) is also in the village. She adds that “the speaker’s belief that the owner will not see him stopping to watch the snow fall in the woods subtly suggests that he has somehow fallen outside of God’s range of vision or concern”, which is precisely the condition of one experiencing a “dark night of the soul”.

Susan Jeffurs illustration from the picture book version of Frost’s poem (image from literaryfictions.com)
It all folds up so neatly into a literary piece of origami! The Divine Comedy is woven so thoroughly through the fabric of literature through the centuries and is awash in Dante’s coruscating spiritual, political and historical, mythological and literary genius. And I believe it can be threaded backward as well as forward. I haven’t read St. John of the Cross’ work in its entirety, but in the excerpt that I’ve seen, he ties the condition to the seven deadly sins. In Canto I of the Inferno, as Dante struggles in his loss of the “straight way”, he encounters a leopard, the lion and the she-wolf, which represent three of those sins: lust, pride and avarice (extreme greed). This suggests to me that St. John of the Cross might have had a copy of The Inferno on his desk when he wrote The Dark Night of the Soul.

The leopard represents lust. Leonard Baskin illustration from the Bergin translation (Polloplayer image)
For related posts on Dante and The Divine Comedy, there’s one here for the Paradiso or here for the Purgatorio. As you can tell, I’m no scholar, but I might just be Dante’s most avid fangirl.








































































